Excuse me while I edit myself

To fully understand just how I feel as I'm writing this post please watch this video before reading: Brian Regan.

Now to my words!

I have said many things both smart and stupid.  It seems that those two things go in cycles, there are times that I am really smart then other times when I am really stupid.  I generally notice and realize when the stupid is coming out and am able to correct myself, or as Brian so brilliantly demonstrates, try to shove those words back in my mouth.  Overall though I feel that I do a pretty good job of editing and fixing myself when I commit a verbal faux pas.

The problem is that when it is verbal it's easy to forget the stupid and move on.  Let's face it most of the time my memory doesn't last long enough to remember those moments so once I've corrected them they're gone from my mind.  Lately though I've been editing my book and it is hard to see my own stupid in writing.  I look at what I wrote and can't help but think "Really??  Really??  Why would I write that?"  In order to fix those boo-boos I have to rethink and/or recreate a scene and let me just tell you it is a long process!!  I don't hate everything I've written, there is quite a bit that I really like but I guess I was hoping the editing part of writing would be easier than the writing itself.  Unfortunately I'm finding it to be just as challenging, if not more so, than the initial first draft.  As much as I wish that the first written draft had been perfect I realize that I have to keep drafting to polish up the written "baby" that has taken so long for me to finish. I have to keep going!!!

I have long heard that we are our own worst critic and I hope that statement is true.  Perhaps I need to set that saying a default header in my word document in order to encourage myself to continue trudging through the words of my novel.  In the meantime please excuse me while I edit myself in the written word.