Conquering the teenage
years is difficult enough, but is even harder when one discovers that they are
a man-killing dragon.
In my fantasy book Transformation, a 53,000 word manuscript,
17 year old Asha must not only discover who she is but what she
is after accidentally murdering her mother. Without a home to return to she takes
refuge with an unknown mentor who pushes her to the brink of physical and
emotional exhaustion. Asha must learn to
not only harness the extraordinary power within but come to terms with the
killer inside herself. However, her new-found talents and
humanity will be challenged when an ancient evil from her past rises
threatening her existence.
This book is the first in a planned two book series with YA with
elements similar to Eragon and Dragons of Autumn Twilight.
I have always enjoyed reading and writing YA
literature and have been immersed in the teenage psyche for the past five years
as a high school English teacher. As a
writer I have done script notes and story notes for Sock Monster Productions
based out of Hollywood California. The
latest script, called “Mountain Home”, is being considered by a studio for
production. While none of my own works have been published I look forward to finding an outstanding agent with enthusiasm for my stories!
Below are the first 250
words of my manuscript. Thank you for
your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
Amber Buckley
She held the baby
close to her heaving chest. Her gaze shot
skyward expecting to see the eyes, those eyes, to be staring down at her. When nothing appeared from between the clouds
she sighed a soft exhale of relief. She
pulled the baby away from her body and looked at its soft face. The pink
complexion glowed in the moonlight as the child slumbered unaware of their
imminent danger. She stroked the child’s cheek with her index finger, tears
stinging her eyes. So young. How could she leave someone so young? Her chest swelled with sorrow and tears fell
making it appear as if the baby’s face was covered in flecks of glass. She held the baby back up to her chest her
heart thumping a message against the child’s face. The message she hoped her child would never
forget.
She had to act
quickly, those eyes weren’t far behind her.
Grabbing a branch she moved it aside and looked at the building. It was run down. The windows on the second
story sagged and the porch sloped inward making the building look like it wore
a perpetual frown. The sign on the front
of the building was still hanging but worn with age. All she could make out were the words
“inn”. Her hands shook, this wasn’t
ideal but she didn’t have much choice. She
couldn’t let him get her baby.
The patter of rain started. She
removed a blanket from her pack wrapping the baby inside of it…
Good luck in the competition! (Are you on Twitter, btw? And what's the genre of your novel?)
ReplyDeleteI am on Twitter though I don't use it much (if ever). The genre of my novel is Fantasy. Thanks for the well wishes!
ReplyDeleteHiya again! You'll probably need to put your genre somewhere in the query so the judges aren't hunting around trying to find it. :o) (Also, if you have the time, you might want to check out #TheWVoice on Twitter as lots of the other contestants will be hanging out there.)
ReplyDeleteI am so curious to find out how she killed her mom...Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteHi Amber,
ReplyDeleteNice hook in your query letter. Good luck!
Mia
Hey Amber. Great first 250, but it looks like you omitted a "to" in the first sentence. Might want to fix that up. Good luck and all the best!
ReplyDeleteThe first sentence of the query is fabulous--a real attention-grabber. Dragons, magic, all such wonderful fun. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI like the hook in your query made me want to read to find out how it happens. Good luck! :)
ReplyDeleteI was intrigued by the "unknown mentor." Sounds mysterious!
ReplyDeleteGreat query hook! And I really liked your first 250. Best of luck to you!! :)
ReplyDeleteGreat opening! Good luck in the contest!
ReplyDelete