Happy New Year!

With 2013 coming to an end I wish that I could say I am being thoughtful and reflective, carefully choosing those things I will fix/change in 2014 but I'm not.  Nope, I have never really believed in making a list of resolutions as they always seem to fall by the wayside come January 3rd.  Here's what an average resolution has looked like like for me in the past:

Me:  "Okay this year I am going to eat healthier."
Sickles McWiggins (my inner voice whose name constantly changes but for now that's what we'll call her): "Oh?  Healthy eating?  Good for you!  What else are you going to do?"
Me: "Daily scripture study!"
S.M.: "Excellent!  Make the body and the spirit healthy!"
Me: "Indeed!" a smile of pride bursting on my face.

*Day 1*
Me: "Healthy, healthy, healthy" looking for breakfast.
S.M.: "Oatmeal is healthy."
Me: "Not in the mood."
S.M.: "Eggs!  Good protein?"
Me: "Nah, I think a bowl of Frosted Flakes sounds about right."
S.M.: *audible slap to the forehead*  "Well did you at least do your scripture study?"
Me: "Yes I did!" slurping on my sugary cereal milk and a smaller smile of pride bursting on my face as I did accomplish one thing that day.

*Day 2*
Me: "Healthy, healthy, healthy" scrounging for a snack.
S.M.: "Almonds?  Almonds are healthy?"
Me: "What am I a squirrel?" reaching for the bag of M&Ms
S.M.: "Something is wrong with you."
Me: "Green is a vegetable."
S.M.: "Scriptures today?"
Me: "One or two verses, I did open them."  Almost discernible smile as I shove more green M&Ms in my mouth.

*Day 3*
Me: "Healthy...."
S.M.: "Really?  We're going to go through this ridiculous ruse again?"
Me: "Hey I resent that comment."
S.M.: "Oh shut up and feed me Doritos."
Me: "You read my mind."
S.M.: "I am your mind!  Hey how about those scriptures?"
Me: "Uh....  I sang Head, Shoulders, Knees, & Toes does that count?"
S.M.: "What??  How in the world would that count?"
Me: "The little kids at church sing it so it must be considered a hymn ergo it is scripture."
S.M.: *Huge sigh* "You know what let's just give this up and turn on some Walking Dead, you don't tell anyone and I won't tell anyone, deal?"
Me: "Deal!  I like you..."  turn on Netflix.

As you can see no matter my resolutions on Dec. 31 the idea of a list and a mental compilation of all that I should do never seem to do me much good.  There are lots of things that I could (and should) change but rather than create that list and inevitably fail I'll tell you what I will do and not fail at in 2014:

1.  Spend time with my daughter & be the best mother that I can be.
2.  Read more.
3.  Edit my writing.
4.  Sleep when given the opportunity.
5.  Nerd out whenever possible; the genre matters not (fantasy, sci-fi, superheroes, costumes).
6. Be true to myself.

S.M. and I just had a chat and that list seems to be one we can both agree upon. So there you have it!   I hope that whether you are a resolution maker or not you are able to find those things that will bring you joy and fulfillment in 2014.  May your year be blessed.  Happy New Year!!

Mind altering story telling

One of the few joys of being a teacher is having Christmas Break, a time when one can relax a little and catch up on all the non-school related things that have been lurking on the "to do list".  Although sleep was a top priority on my list (doesn't happen with a toddler who believes that 7:45 am is the best time of day) I also had determined to do a little bit of "geeking" on my break.  I started off with one of my favorite, and most often neglected pass times, reading.  I had re-read "The Book Thief" and was genuinely curious to see what else this author had written.  I picked up this gem from the school library and dove right in:

 The story itself is fast paced and fun to read. The conclusion that I had come to prior to finishing the last chapter was that it was just that, fun and nothing else.  However, when I read the last chapter my entire world and perception of the book turned completely upside down!  Never in all my life have I seen an author do what he did, I can't say much because I don't want to spoil the surprise for anyone that wants to read this book but let me just say this if you are not REALLY paying attention to the person who shows up in the last chapter and exactly what that person does you will miss the entire point of the novel and the whole reason that this story blew my mind!  I know for sure that this novel will definitely forever impact the way I view my own characters.

Now just as a disclaimer there is some rough scenes and language in this book so reader be warned, if you are easily offended don't read this book...  I've given my disclaimer.

Now the second thing that I have long wanted to do was check out this series on Netflix:

The story of Sherlock has always intrigued me plus actors who both played in "The Hobbit"?  Score one for geek out time!  There is not one defining moment of this series that I would pinpoint as the best moment of story telling, the whole thing is just utterly amazing in the woven web of secrets, clues, and character expansion.  A broad spectrum of tale telling that had me hanging from minute one to the very last moment of the last episode on Netflix.  Once the show was over an audible sigh of frustration escaped me as the writers left me wishing for more.  My point in telling you this?  What a brilliant method of story telling!  While television obviously has some advantages in showing details and dropping hints the ability to interweave such details and leave the audience hanging is so meticulously carried out that I felt like a shrieking fan girl at a teeny bopper concert crying for more!  I can only hope that by observing their methodology I too can create a piece that makes my readership wanting more!

Overall both pieces are pieces that changed the way I think about story telling, each in their own way has given me a lot to think about in my own tale creation.  It is sad to see my Christmas break come to end as there are many other books, movies, and tv series I had hoped to take in but until next time I will soak in what I have learned!

Merry Christmas to all!

I'm no poet but for whatever reason the mood struck me so here you go:

Twas Christmas night and all through the rooms
Peace lay on our hearts as we gazed towards the moon.
It had been a day full of Christmas fun and surprises
This woman’s wishes had been granted, or so she surmises.
Never before had this woman imagined her life could feel so full.
Her home filled with love and a warm after glow.
Long after the presents and meals had been eaten
the love of her family had lingered unbeaten.
Seeing the joy of her toddler and blessings of the season
Made her realize that it all was here for a reason
The birth of one man and his heavenly mission
Gave us the meaning to enjoy this great session
Together with family and friends gathered en mass
Enjoying what truly is a Merry Christmas.

It's not the best but I hope your Christmas was as wonderful as mine!

The reason for the season!

November is over and hooray for the relief that the end of 50,000 words brings December brings on a whole different set of challenges!  Between Christmas prep & lesson planning I've had only a few moments to breathe!  Though I have to say that within the course of the last few weeks I have found that in this joyous holiday season there have been humble and quiet moments of peace.  It is in those moments that I can actually reflect upon what I've been given and truly feel that I am blessed.  The most striking of these moments hit me today as I was home with my daughter watching her toddle around.  She's figured out she can walk and oh boy is she walking!!  Those legs unsteady like the wobble of a newborn deer take her from one end of the house to the other and she just beams with pride at her new found accomplishment.  I was on the floor just watching her run around and there was a brief moment where, with my sneaker in hand, she paused, looked over her shoulder at me, and with a sparkle in her eyes just grinned at me. Without a word she had communicated to me a joy and pride that I can't describe in words.  As she walked away I couldn't help but think of the season and the reason for the season.  I can not imagine the joy, pride, and pain that Mary had to endure upon the birth of her son Jesus Christ.  What a great and humbling moment that was for me as I saw just a glimpse of what pure joy is and I could truly appreciate all that has been given for me and my daughter!  

My one true hope is that this holiday season holds joy and peace for you giving you a moment of insight into the true reason for the season!

The paradigm shift of a parent!

Now that I've let my own story telling cool off for a bit I have decided to do a bit of reading once more.  As I perused my personal bookshelves debating again and again which book I should dive into (Lord of the Rings was in that contest for a very long time) I decided to split from the world of fantasy briefly and picked this beauty:

The last time I read this book was about 4 years ago.  I didn't recall a lot of details about the book other than death is the narrator, it is WWII Germany, and there is a hidden Jew in the book.  I also recall absolutely falling in love with the story and the story telling so I decided it was high time I give this another read through.  

Keep in mind my first child was born just a little over a year ago so the first time I read this I was a childless woman.  As I opened the pages and started reading through the first two chapters it took everything within me not to fall apart as I read about the death of a young child and how death, the narrator, describes the scene and the mother's reaction. There are moments in life when your entire paradigm shifts and suddenly everything is viewed in a different light, this was one of those moments.  

Since I didn't have a child the first time I read this I didn't understand the depth of that loss or the love that mother felt.  I read it, it made me sad, that was it.  Now as a first time mother the thought hit me in the gut like a sack of bricks!   I just couldn't help but have an internal dialogue with this book when I kept thinking "Oh how the tides have turned since last we met my friend!"I almost couldn't make it through the first few chapters but somehow I managed.  Once I made it past that part the story telling and reading of the story became much easier I fell in love with the book all over again.  

I still maintain that this is one of the most brilliantly written pieces of fiction I have ever read!  I will still recommend this to anyone who asks but I will be sure, from now on, to include the disclaimer that if you have a child be prepared for a tug at the heart strings within the first few pages. I just can't believe how differently the story struck me now that my perspective has changed.  I fully intend to pick up another of my beloved books (Lord of the Rings?) and I am curious to see how this new shift will impact my reading of those titles?  Only time will tell.

The things I learned from Nano

It is finally the end of the month and hallelujah I made the goal of 50,000 words.  I'm not going to lie there were several times I didn't think I'd make it and there were times I wanted to quit but somehow I endured.  It has been a long month but here are some of the things I learned from my writing experience:

1.  It doesn't matter what you write just write!  Even if I was writing a conversation as stupid as "why did you do that?" "I don't know, why did you do that?" "I don't know." I was still working my way through my stories.  Sometimes these moments of humdrum brought about an exciting surprise and that's why I just had to stick to it!

2.  Let go of the perfectionist.  I am a writing perfectionist, I think because I have been teaching for so long and stress proofreading to my kids so often I find myself caught in a vicious cycle of thinking "that wasn't perfect/what I wanted" then I get very liberal with the backspace button.  Nano made me stop doing that and honestly that is one of the biggest lessons I learned!  I need to stop re-hashing and re-writing and just move on.  Which brings me to my next point...

3.  The time for editing is later.  So many times while I was writing I would think, "Hmmmm.... did I include that minor detail in chapter 2?  Did I remember to explain (minor plot element) here? Man this writing sucks!"  while those things are important and they do need to be put in the book it is also important to just keep moving ahead.  Once the manuscript is done that is when I can go back and go through all the details with a fine tooth comb, for now just getting to the finish line is the key!

4.  Writing every day is hard work!  I started to feel like it was my part time job!  I appreciate the good habit of writing that this taught me but I also see that I'm a better writer when I have a day or two to mull over what I have written then can go back to the story fresh.  The every day writing burned me out!

5.  Time for a much needed break!  I appreciate my Nano experience and all that I learned from it, plus I finished two transcripts, but it is time for a break from writing.  My plan for the next week or so is instead of writing at night time to start reading more frequently.  The writing time cut into my reading time and I am missing the comfort of other's stories so for now I'll step away from my own stories and indulge in someone else's.